Wat was i thinking?

This semester has been a hell to me..

Piano Literature is the main culprit.
School hours has been prolonged and everything just jumbled up like nobody's business...

I've been extremely depressed since the school starts... so many things happened i feels like i am involved in a movie, watching myself stumbled against life...

Most of it is because of studies... I've never feel so stress in study in my whole life before this.. It's really been hell busy to me and i dun even have time to shit properly (seriously)

And i have problems in my relationship for a while early this year..

Man...

So y am i so free to write my emotional passage here u ask?

I am going to meet someone who's very important to someone who is very important to me.. (am i making sense?) And... at first i tot i can accept it.. i tot i can get along and it's just something i have to face if that person who is important to me is really important to me..
But when he just told me bout it.. i just realized i cant accept it.. I can't... maybe it's just temporary.. maybe it's just i am not used to it.. maybe it's still not the time ... or maybe i haven prepared for it...

So what?~

I dunno... lots of things in my mind.. i feel so alone... i remembered the dream he told me bout.. the dream without me in that whole family... where's my statues? how important i am to him? is it the same like me?

I dunno how to express my feelings towards him that i am scared... yes.. i am really scared... i wanna face someone i dunno and that person is certainly more important than me.. i dun wanna our life to changed.. but i know it will from now on... i hate my feelings...

I know i shld be happy for him but i am not... i feeling myself being selfish...

But he dun understand tat i am scared.. and i duno how to let him know how i feel..

Everything just messed up...

Pls tell me what to do....