Thursday, April 26, 2007

Exaggerated?? I don't think so...

Last two days, a guy named Chris called me. I can’t explain how excited I am after talking to him. How I wish I could just scream out loud~ Finally!! I’ve found a band that plays similar type of music my ex-band used to play and most importantly, he replied me! How I wish I could fly back to KL now and have a jamming session with those people. I don’t care how it will turn out; I just want to have fun! And I really do hope things will work out smoothly. ^^

It has been a while I go around searching for vacant band to join after the “great lost” of mine… It’s true that I myself was shocked to be carried away by the overwhelmed feeling deep down inside my soul. Nobody can understands how I endure the sleepless nights and hatred that had grew so hard inside me which nearly cost me to lost the most important person of my life. It tranquilizes me. No joke. I’ve never realized the passion inside me grew so huge, so hard and so fast even I myself could not resist. I tried to free myself from that emotion, I tried to bottle it up, and I tried to run away from it. But it stays silently in me until this very day. It’s true that I lied to people around me, even myself. I told myself to listen to my mother and friends, for it is not my profession, nor it is a professional thing to do (according to them). And I should do something more meaningful, something more professional, something belongs to the “higher-class people”.

Seriously, who cares?! I’ve realized something lately and I shall stop lying to myself. Having a band of my own had been my dream since I was young, and I shall fulfill this dream and not to be ashamed of it. And I shall give the credit to Avril Lavigne. Since there are totally no bands to be seen or heard in the place where I grew up, she’s my only influence and model to be followed. So what I am a classical student? I can do something contemporary student can do and I vow to do it better! However, it has been a mistake for me to search for the suitable persons in school that have the same passion, and most importantly, the same bond. It’s so much harder than I thought. People don’t seem to give a damn to u when they feel that u have nothing. But the problem is, they judge people so fast that they can’t even see how it happens. Well, I’ve given up the idea of depending on my school, and try to be smart. Maybe it’s my problem. Or maybe luck doesn’t fall on my side. And this is the main reason I clanged so hard on my previous band when they abandoned it, and make myself miserable because I have a feeling I will never find another band like them ever. Therefore, I’ve decided to go on my own even people disapprove me. So what if I really can’t sing as well as somebody u know? I have faith and passion stronger than anyone else. I am sure of that. I’ve been through so much I don’t mind endure even more just to achieve what i wanted.


Because this is my dream.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

YA MAN!! STAY STRONG!!SO HAPPY FOR YOU!!
P.U.S.H.=Pray Till Something Happens!!
F.R.O.G.=Forever Relying On God
It will come 1 day..n its coming i see, rite??so stay strong gal!!

p/s:*still waiting for sentimental post* hahahha!!!

Anonymous said...

SENTIMENTAL POST!!!HAHAHAH

Anonymous said...

totally agree, the most important thing is the strong passion and the faith..